As someone who has memorized Superbad in its entirety and who got ready to go out last night by drinking to old Cash Money videos, it’s very rare that something is too immature and distasteful for me. Unfortunately, it’s gotten to that point with most of Eminem’s catalogue. I would never dream of downplaying his talent or writing ability, but as I take baby steps towards adulthood, I find that I cannot listen to his music without cringing.
Today I say goodbye to The Marshall Mathers LP after one last listen. It’s a sentimental moment for me, and I’m fighting to hold back tears as I write this. The Marshall Mathers LP (MMLP) played a major role in my youth and each song brings back a flood of memories.
When it came out in 2000, I was twelve years old growing up in the suburbs of Delaware. My peers and I loved rap, as it was the most compelling and badass music of the era, but we couldn’t help but notice that most of our favorite rappers didn’t look like us. We could recite the lyrics of entire albums, but as rough as our recess football games could get, we didn’t quite relate to the tales of violent street life.
Eminem tapped perfectly into our prepubescent angst. “We lost to St. Andrews in lacrosse and now Mom wants me to take out the garbage?!” I’d turn “The Way I Am” up loud enough to cause permanent hearing damage, shadow box at the foot of my bed and feel a burst of righteous empowerment. “They can’t make me take out the garbage, and they can’t make me do my algebra homework either. It’s my life and I don’t give a fuck.”
And my goodness could the man put words together. His songs had strings of cadenced multi-syllable rhymes that made the ABAB schemes we diagramed in English Class seem hopelessly pedestrian. “Pigeon-holed into some poppy sensation that got me rotation at rock’n'roll stations.” Eminem combined the verbiage of Edgar Allen Poe with the emotional maturity of a potty-mouthed fourth grader, which is remarkable. Whether remarkably impressive or remarkably pathetic is in the eye of the beholder, but it is remarkable nonetheless.
MMLP is Eminem at his peak as both an incredible lyricist and an abnormal psychology case study. Because the album resonated so strongly with me, it brings a flood of memories when I listen to it. It makes me nostalgic, but it’s the same kind of nostalgia I get when I remember waking up out of a blackout hugging the toilet in my freshman year bathroom. It’s kind of funny but it’s painfully embarrassing at the same time. When I listen to MMLP, my thoughts aren’t “those were the days,” but more along the lines of “wow, we would actually spend entire lunch periods arguing about who had the largest penis,” and “yeah, I’m glad I’m not in junior high anymore.”
I’m not sure exactly which part of the album was the tipping point that made me decide I could not listen to it as a decent adult. Maybe it was the chorus to “Under the Influence:” “So you can suck my dick if you don’t like my shit, cuz I was high when I wrote this so suck my dick.” Maybe it was the deranged “Kim,” in which he describes the murder of his wife in vivid detail and channels the spirit of a sick killer. Maybe it was that he spends an entire verse of “Criminal” describing his disgust and hatred of gay people and then finds it necessary to include a skit with a graphic simulation of gay group sex. Maybe it’s that he acknowledges and disses the Insane Clown Posse. Maybe it’s the two appearances by Bizarre, a less talented and more perverted version of Eminem who describes raping both his sister and his cousin in the same verse. Maybe it’s Eminem’s claim that if Jennifer Lopez were his mother, he would still impregnate her, creating a new brother and uncle (I actually still think that one’s funny. As I said before, I’m taking baby steps toward adulthood.)
There is very little mature rap music, but MMLP falls into his own category of immaturity. It goes beyond the good-natured if unrealistic alpha-male posturing and violent boasting of most rap, and becomes pathetic and depressing. I’m going to miss listening to the album, and even as I cross my fingers for Drake’s debut, I admit that it’ll probably be a long time before I hear a rapper that talented. But at a certain point, you have to let go of your childhood, and as an adult I just can’t bring myself to listen to MMLP. At least until the next time I get fired or have a break up, when I really have a deep angst that others can’t understand.
I dont know. Being a man raised and currently living in the inner city. I dont hear all of his words literally. Its about showcasing verbal ability, and rhyme. All of which he does (probably) better than any MC. I realize this is old, but i thought Id point that out. Even if you threw it away. It was still purchased. Lol. Good one.